She May Not Be Happy You Waited...

If you've gone through the process, time has passed, and suddenly she wakes one night and turns to you and says... "YOU OWE ME!"

"What?" you groggily respond.

It occurs to her, that if you had the courage to mention your dreams, fantasies, and thoughts that you would have been teased and denied for a decade earlier, and she would have been enjoying a delicious decade of abundant loving and pleasure.

Maybe you should think about this now, instead of waiting 'till the time is right'.  Wouldn't you much rather come clean and be able to discuss anything and everything with your partner?

Remember, this is for her pleasure too; this is not all about you.  And the benefits go well beyond your occasional fantasy..  As I saw this image today, it occurred to me that it applies to chastity play as well.  By entering the world of chastity play with her, you lose that precious access to your ability to pleasure yourself whenever you wish.  But in the long run, you gain much much more by surrendering that key to her. If you read the post last week about the BIG question Why, you should have some insight why the denial is important to you.  And as she realizes all the benefits to her, and why the teasing that she does each day comes back to her as priceless gifts of time and pleasure from you, well...

Now follow this up with the other saying that also struck me today...

And add to the end of this one 'For You and Especially for Her'. Game On... now, go play.


Have a great week.  Caged.

Diversity & Communication

After skimming through a few blogs this morning, I see a common thread again that I've written about numerous times... and it still appears as a major barrier to many of us. Communication. I probably don't need to reiterate the importance of it again (you will find it many times through the history of my blog), so I'll fore go the subject, other than to say I wish there were as easier way for each of us to stop dancing around the thoughts in our heads and just get it right.

Another theme that peeks from under the sheets... diversity. Thankfully, each of us is a bit different and our response to the variety of stimuli is as varied as the day is long. While I really enjoy reading the blogs, and try not to judge what stirs emotions in one direction or another, I find it incredibly interesting that the general themes surface as they do. I can see as I write this that I could easily spend the rest of the day writing on the subject, but that won't happen with the dead lines I have. Perhaps another time...

I most appreciate when couples share their thoughts on the blogs, and see responses from partners that indicate the emotions or thoughts from their partners seem to flow through where they might not have made it through the verbal exchange, or even the barrage of events that pass through our daily lives. Kudos to those of you that find a way to extend that communication and understanding that we all seek. What I do wonder is if our simply wearing of the steel cage and surrendering the key to our ladies is a special extension of making that higher level of communication possible between us. Intimacy with extra frosting on the cake...

Ok, and yes, then there is all the deep emotions associated with 'OMG - He is giving me the power of control over his orgasms... and allowing me unlimited pleasure to all I can have'.

I'm rambling and must get back to the tasks at hand... (no, not that one, real work). Have a great day in chastity.

Most Important

After reading an insightful post over at Watching Your Wife, I'm reminded that very high of the list of important things is the love you share with your wife or significant other. Although this is not always mentioned in some of my posts, none of this blog is relevant without it.

Love her... and communicate with her, and love her even more. Yes, I know people write volumes on the subject, as I probably could too. Understanding where each of us sits on the spectrum of life, relationships, kink and pleasure is all so much an individual book in itself. Share it with your spouse first... and then of course with the rest of us so that we may learn.

Hope it is a great week... snowing of course here in the Rockies, but beautiful. I can't believe we are already into December.

Communication is so hard...

I don't seem to have time to really read the blogs like I did... occasionally a comment seems to hang in my brain, especially if I head to bed soon after closing down for the evening. One gentleman mentions leaving a couple web pages open by accident... only to be noticed by his wife. That little moment brought about a series of communication, with a few days of time to contemplate those discussions, that ultimately opened a few tense and exciting changes in their relationship.

Oh... to have such an open minded discovery...

Hope everyone has a fun & playful loving weekend.

Moving toward Valentines Day

This is not a day to ignore in most happy homes, although I must. She does not appreciate this date on the calendar, thinking it is only there for commercial reasons. "Every day should be Valentine's Day..." Ok, I can't argue with that. I hope everyone has a very special day, however you chose to celebrate...

Of course, some of us may be planning ahead and treat the day as a special time to explore a little fun... Have fun with this idea; use him now, or tease and deny him a bit before the weekend..?

Have fun and keep loving...

Dreaming again... T&D

As I was doing other things, I managed to allow sex to creep into my mind for a moment... I know, that is probably typical male, but in my state of mind, it was more of a miracle. And maybe healthy. I logged in and played with a 'new look' for this blog, re-published some of my earlier posts, and reading through some of them. Damn... I should get back to real work, but I'm a bit distracted and venture into reading into some of the other interesting blogs.

Like the wife of a favorite, Ms Bdenied, writing about her perspective on 'tease & denial' that it was a bit of a journey for her to appreciate that, even though it seemed harsh and even cruel, it really is something many of us 'males' do (maybe reluctantly) want, and hope you women can come to actually enjoy. That part of it, I suspect, only comes with trial & error, but once some of the other aspects of it become apparent, you will appreciate this play with increasing ease.

This of course, comes with a bit of a caveat, that will vary with each of us. The teasing and denial, even over a few days, will ultimately build to climax. Yes, we have granted you the power of control, and the decision is yours, and hopefully, to maximize the harvest of all that this play has to offer, you will know when to fully appreciate the time to peak enjoyment for both of you. As the blog comments mentioned, this is play we all need to consider more... and offers the honest communication possibility for this spark of intimacy. Ladies, if think your lover is not open to this, just strip him down and talk about it... the observation may prove that not all communication is verbal.

Enjoy... everyone.